I wrote this in High School.

The meaning of love is thrown around like an old rag doll. but when I say it.. I mean it.. with every breath I take.. I don't say it to impress you.. nor to win you over. I just want you to know that when I say I love you, I truly mean it.. when I look upon your face and look into your eye's I can find it in you.. that everything you are.. is what I want.. and without you I am nothing inside nor to this world.. its not worth taking another breath nor living a single moment without you near or by my side.. at times I try to open my eye's in search of another.. but then I realize there is no other man that can treat me like u do.. and there is no man to make me change the way I feel about you.. I just want to show you I love you and want to be with you.. and now I realize and understand why.. and that's because my feelings for you are true and pure.. and all I want to do is to be with you.. to spend every minute with you and my whole life with you.. to have your children.. and yes I've already thought this through.. I love you for you.. what can I really say to make you realize that you are the only on for me... I shouldn't have too.. you should already know this.. and I know you feel the same way.. but baby I know we are young... I know your happy and in love with me... but babe I want to be your wife.. even if it was only for one day.. I would be so happy just for that one day.. I appreciate you for you.. and all the things you done for me.. without you I'm incomplete.. at the same time I'm afraid of what you might think... I'm not ashamed for the way I'm expressing to you I just need your to know even if I've said this a thousand times.. I want to take all your pain and problems away.. I love the way you smile and the way you look.. even when your at your worse.. when your sick, hurt, or anything I'll be right by your side... saying hey everything will be alright.. I'm here to hold you tight and tell you I love you.. I want to spend those long hard or nice nights by your side.. I wanna love you like no other girl can... I wanna be your super girl.. your Mrs.sweetheart.. I know you understand..I wanna take you places you've never seen before... I wanna be the one who you only dream of and wake up with in the mornings.. I wanna spend time with you staring at that morning sky.. or the late night star's.. I pray every night for your forgiveness, love, affection, and protection.. I love you so much that there are no words to describe to you how I really feel.. but I'll be that girl you can run to with your problems... I'll be that girl to stick up for all your decisions.. and be the one taking a bullet to the chest to save you.. I would travel a million miles to come get you.. I would look for you night and day if you were lost or gone missing.. I would stop doing whatever I'm doing just to look at you.. smile.. just to say I love u.. I would give you everything.. I will love you and have you in my heart till I die... even if I grow old alone... without you.. I'll be happy doing that just to prove to you I truly do love you.. there's no words that can explain how I feel.. I want to hold your hand look you straight in that eyes and say boo I love you with all my heart.. I want to be the one you grow old with.. the one you marry.. the one you have kids with.. I wanna be your prom date.. all I'm trying to prove or say is anything and everything I would do for you.. and that's because... I love you with all of my HEART... and always will FOREVER...

Top 10 facts.

I was tweeted to do Top 10 facts on here. So here it goes.

This should be interesting. 

1.  I have a very bad obsession with clothes, purses, and shoes. I mean it is horrible!! I have a walk-in clothes that my dad built for me and all my crap, and I still don’t have enough room for it all! I work in retail so I can get stuff for like dirt cheap so it’s not bad. Like you could pay 24 bucks if not more for a pair of jeans, I however never pay more then 10 bucks! That’s pretty nice!!!!

2. Make-up and Hair… OMG I thought my clothing items were a bad obsession I was wrong. I never go and get my hair done or my nails. I do it all myself! I am constantly told I need to go to cosmetology school because everything always turns out great. And for as many times that I have dyed my hair its perfect! I rarely have split ends and when I do get them its time for a cut anyway. I pride myself in my hair and my make-up. Oh yes, and don’t forget about the nails. I love doing nails as well.

3. I have a lot of pet peeves but my biggest one is the toilet seat, and burps!!!! If you burp at home its fine, but when we are out in public and you do it expect a kick or a smack!! I even smack my mom if she does it! And what is up with every guy leaving the seat up!! For real you lifted it up to go what is so hard about putting the damn thing back down!!!!!! GOSH!

4. I can not live with out TUMBLR, and my TWITTER! If one of them isn’t working I go crazy. I have even called the “help” number on both because they weren’t working. It’s bad I know, but those are they only I talk to certain people and the only I can get in touch with them.

5. Food obsessions: I am addicted to Green Olives! It’s pretty bad, I crave them all the time!! I must always have SWEET TEA! We are from GA so sweet tea is in our blood. My grams makes it, it is always in stock in the fridge! I have really bad cravings its like I’m pregnant 24/7, I am always wanting something!!

6. 30 Seconds To Mars <3 I have seen them live 4 times. Meet Shannon at one, Jared at another one! They are truly one amazing band, and even better people! I am so proud to call them family along with the rest of the ECHELON. I am not going to talk about the ECHELON that will take to long!! ;)

7. I am a huge movie junky! I have well over 100 movies and more get added daily! I not into comedy, I just don’t find most of them really that funny. I love horror and suspense, the movies that keep you on your toes. But since I am a girl, girly movies are alright.
Top 5 Movies
1. Titanic
2. Dawn of the Dead
3. P.S. I Love You
4. All Fast and Furious movies
5. Little Mermaid

8. Music!! I listen to everything, literally everything. Right now anything that makes me want to move is good! Debstep is really working it right now. I have just found a new love though….. Skrillex have been listening to his stuff for like a month straight! It’s just so AWESOME.

9. I am in LoVe. Rob and I have been dating since 06. We have had our rough times, but what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger right. We have known each other since 05 and dated before and broke up. It gave us time to grow up and realize that what we want is each other. We are in it for the long run. There are some people out there that don’t like the idea of that, but they will just have to move on. If they can do that!

10. Finally!! I may be a girl and like girly things. But I am no where near a girly girl! I love to fish, go hiking, I play sports, and mudding at my aunt and uncles farm is what I do best! They have a ton of land so we can go there anytime and get the four wheelers out or the snow mobiles. I have a key to the mad house (garage) where all the toys are. They have a private pound that they stock up every year. I love going out there and just chill. I do a ton of writing and singing out there. It’s amazing!

Well that is 10. Peace Out

Till we meet again.

Goodness! It has been forever, I totally forgot about this! Well lets have a recap of the life since the last post shall we…..

Well it’s now 2012!!! Woot Woot. Yeah not! 2011 was good to me, but it was also a rough year. So many things happened! My aunt had a baby!! Now remember her youngest is a Freshman in High School. But Madyson is the cutest baby out there!! I love that kid to death! <3 She is a mini me for sure! And the scariest thing is, our baby pictures look alike. Anyways, moving on. Work is still work! I love it but I hate at the same time. But since I worked my ass off in the spring and the summer months I have had all of December and January off . Due to me being to close to hours that I am allowed for the year. Lame I know but it has given me plenty of time to do things I have been meaning to do. Like clean my disaster of a room. It was sooooo bad it’s not even funny.

My relationships were not well in 2011. My father and I are still not really talking. I hasn’t said happy birthday to me in years. But that is how are relationship just is I guess. My mom and I are still on track. Thanks to 30STM tho, that’s pretty much the only thing we have in common. Rob and I however, had a MAJOR rough patch. Things were fine till July. His parents were gone so I stayed over there. One night he invited his friends over for a party and a few of them including him got wasted. They all left and he thought it would be a good time to throw up ALL over the kitchen and the bathroom. Me being the nice person I am I cleaned it all up. Gave him meds and bread. Towels for pillows, I didn’t sleep at all that night and had to wake up early to go to work. As did he.

Next thing I know its time to go home. So I leave work to go back to his house only to have him say leave. We didn’t talk for two days! Then he calls me up and says he wants a break. Which turns into break up. I was DONE!! I had been there for everything for him. The arrest, grams death, friends being un true, EVERYTHING! And he does that to me. Two week after that was our 5 year anny. I was heart broken, I shut down. I didn’t want to talk to anyone, went to work and did my job and left everyday. He later said sorry and I say no. No your not, to this day he still can’t tell me why he did it, what he was thinking. We ended up going camping and working things out.

Sadly things are still rough. Because I am no longer in school. I don’t have the money and my parents make to much for me to get aid. He says he will pay for it no problem. Well I see a huge problem, I call it July. He will break up with me again and say I owe him for schooling. I don’t want help, I’m not the type! If I can’t do it on my own then I don’t need it. I don’t like things handed to me! That doesn’t help your person.

Well other then that things in 2011 were perfect! I saw my favorite band (30 Seconds To Mars) 2 times. Went to a few weddings and drank way to much. Had a major part of my life born. There may have been a few bumps in the road. But nothing I can’t over come and forget in 2012.

With all respects 2012 you better kick ass!!!!

It's My Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Old enough to know better. Young enough to NOT care. 

I am looking forward to nothing! You may ask why...

Well I truly dislike my bday. Weird I know but nothing ever goes as planed. 

This year I shall be home alone while everyone is out  at work/school. 

Thus the Birthday blues. 

I shall write more later... I must sleep now. ;}